Ahhhhh fisherman, we live for the ultimate bend in that fishing rod. There is nothing better than that screeching sound of the line being pulled off of your reel and watching the rod double over under the strain of a really big catch. What a rush!!
But what a buzz kill it is when you realize that what you've caught is your own boat. Yup about 10 feet of line wrapped around the prop like a spool of thread. Lesson number 342, don't put the boat in reverse while someone's fishin' outta the back.
Have you ever wondered what would happen if you ran over one of those crab trap things with your boat? Lesson number 343, the rope that attaches the buoy to the trap is pretty long so the trap isn't necessarily directly under the warning buoy. Now I've heard rumors that some of you guys feel that my fishing buddy is being wrongfully picked on, so I would like to personally take the fall for this little catastrophe.
Now I'm supposed to be the lookout and I usually do a pretty good job. But lately I've been avidly watching fishing shows and I have become particularly interested in a fish called the Triple Tail. They are elusive and hang out right beside bouys. Those damn fishing shows make everything look so damn easy. Every damn buoy they went to, low and behold, there was a freakin' Triple Tail. I'm sure you can probably see where this is going without my belaboring the point. Lesson number 344 when you're the lookout, YOU NEED TO LOOK OUT!!
Well, we finally got some toilet paper for the boat. No, we don't have a toilet, but since Andrea averages about three bowel and bladder attacks on each trip out she's mastered what some might call, "hangin' it over the side." She absolutely refuses to wear Depends.
Lesson number 345, don't try to remove a wind knot from your line while driving into the wind. Last week while riding from point A to point B I noticed a little wind knot on my spool. I'm thinking, "I'll just pull a little bit off, ok, just a bit more, oh almost got it, a little more, a little more, I have this under control." My thoughts are interrupted by Andrea saying, "Kim, is there a problem?" "What? Huh? No, no problem", I say as I look down at my feet that are tangled up in about 5 feet of fishing line.
Finally and quite possibly most important is lesson 346. When you add a 3 ounce weight to your line you most certainly do not have to heave it with all your might. Especially when you are very close to a bridge that has a fishing catwalk and multiple pedestrians. Can you say involuntary manslaughter?
We haven't been catching a lot of fish but we have laughed a lot. Owning a boat has truly been a character building experience. I'm sure many onlookers have thought, "Look at those two characters!!"
Pictures are coming very soon, I promise!!